Strike Two...

Man, it is so good to be BACK! I know my apologies are getting old, but I AM SORRY for the lengthy hiatus. I had business and legal matters that had to be squared away. Rest assured, I will NOT leave you abandoned like that again. With all of that out of the way, lets get to what you've come here for.

I have tons of content that has been on the shelf, so don't be surprised at the deluge of material. As I have always said: SEND IN ALL OF YOUR PICTURES! Thanks again, people. Without you, Urban Dismay doesn't exist.

Thanks again,

Poppa RotSee

More fireworks

Let me start of by telling everyone that has asked about my absence: I AM TRULY SORRY!!! I'm working on putting a house together and I had some crazy stuff happen (none worthy enough for a post, lol) which kept me away for a spell. I had these pics from the last municipal fireworks display I went to, but as stated earlier, I was too busy to post. There was so much that I didn't get because I was slow on the shutter, but I hope you enjoy these...

I know you're tired, but you're in public...

Poppa needs some brand new swag...

Ain't this the truth!

This has to be one of the funniest, most accurate cartoons I've seen since the Boondocks. The guy that created this got fired from his job at Best Buy because they thought he was making fun of the store, but he never mentioned them. With this kind of talent, he doesn't need to work at Best Buy anyway. Anyone who has ever worked in customer service will relate to this.

Like a wounded fish in the ocean...

Temporarily being without a vehicle (my vehicle was stolen and my insurance company is taking their sweet time settling my claim) has me being extra nice to people with cars that aren't exactly road-worthy. That being said, I couldn't help but get this car on wax. The only reason I took it is because of what was about to ensue. I was riding through Dearborn (for those of you in southeastern Michigan) and pulled up behind this car at a red light. I immediately get to thinking "Are you serious? You must have BIG marbles to drive like this down here!" Not as soon as I processed the thought, a car pulls to the light on the opposite side of the street. After realizing the artistic value of the shot, I couldn't pass it up. Yup, that car that pulled up was the police. See it at the top left of the pic? You know they got 'em.....

Bustin' Out!

Listening to my Pandora radio trying to get some inspiration to post something. Rap wasn't doing it for me so I switch to my Funk channel. Fate must have been on my side because as I'm rocking out to the late, great Rick James' "Bustin' Out", I get this monstosity emailed to me. How appropriate. Notice the tat on her thigh of a diamond? I bet it says something like "Grind 2 Shine" or "Diamond N Da Ruff". I'd say you're just a "Ruff Azz Cubic Zirconia"...

People with kids

These go in the WTF category fa real (in my Pimp C voice)! These parents people with kids need the sh*t slapped out of them:

Seriously? After a hard day's work, you decide to come home and kick it. Job got you stressed. Bills on top of you. Let me have a drink with my homies. "Damn, junior still up?" Hell, I know just what will put him to sleep...

*UPDATE*  Um...Why are you two grown *ss men sitting so close? You're on a sectional, yet your legs are TOUCHING! Thanks to my girl LaKeshia for pointing this out.

DAMMIT!!! Not only are not doing this baby any favors by having it out so soon (clearly this baby is brand-spanking-new), you don't even have the decency to have a proper carrier. As bad as that is, you probably got the bag from the gas station. SMH...

Channelling Shenene

Whomever took this photo is not really your friend. That set of golds silver teeth alone, not to mention those scary crump'n clown eyebrows. I'm just saying...

I'd need a drink too...

Wow...

Thanks to Kalibi for grabbing this one.

Too Murch

Just how much jewelery can one be comfortable wearing? We have silver, gold, costume... Wait. Eureka! I got it. The bling is to distract you from that TRAIN WRECK sitting on top of her head! I shoulda knewn. At least pat that boy down if you think you're going to take a picture, let alone pose for one. Sheesh!


Thanks to my girl Cola for the pic.

Back It Up

I guess I missed the memo stating that baby boomer-aged men wearing mesh shirts was all the rage...

Thanks to People of Walmart for the pic
Back It Up

D's up front, D's in the back

I see this is a growing phenomenon. Ladies, back boobs are NOT hot! Thanks to Epic Fail for the footage

Red light Green light is next...

I'm driving home when I see all these people walking around in a circle. Grown people. My music is on truck volume, so I can't hear anything despite my window being down. When the song I was listening to ended, I could hear music coming from somewhere. Now, I'm still watching the people mosey around when it hits me: These clowns are playing musical chairs! I hit a u-turn and park across the street to make sure I wasn't tripping. I wasn't. Not only were they playing, they were serious. A fight almost ensued when one guy hip checked another guy to make sure he didn't have to watch from the sidelines. SMH...

Word Up!

I know a lot of the older contracts were bad for the artists, but I hear the touring money was ok. So how is it that one of the members of Cameo ends up delivering mail in downtown Detroit? That, my friends, is not just like Candy. It actually makes me want to go Back and Forth...to the barbershop!

Firework'n It!

Sorry for the lengthy delay. A lot has been going on in these neck of the woods. I have a gallery of sorts from all the garbage people had on at our annual fireworks display. Enjoy...

Who told her this was cute?

These two must have been Turbo and Ozone at the Breakin' costume contest

Yes, she is putting tracks in her girl's hair. At the park

Um... Pink is not a good color for you. Furthermore, your skirt needs a bit more fabric. While you're at it, buy your girl some bigger jeans...

Dancin', Dancin', Dancin.....

Only in the summer can you get this kind of action. From what was told, this "gentleman" was getting it in right outside the liquor store. I guess he needed a ready-made audience (or some extra change on whatever he was drinking).

Thanks to Chubb for the pic

It's Kinda Like...Both Of Ours

In the words of Don King: "Only in America!"

Submission by Sean W.

Ugh!

I know this has made the rounds, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity to put this nasty shyt on blast! Shout out to Epic Fail.

Ain't too proud to beg!

This is my not-so-bashful request for all of you to SEND IN MATERIAL!!! I know I'm not the only one out there seeing all this crazy stuff...

I know I was drinking, but...

I'm thoroughly confused. I'm looking around the bar and I'm seeing all these ladies women stand up on their bar stools to sing along to the music. I'm not thrilled, being that there are women who've had one too many on 2 stools down on both sides of me wobbling and I don't want to fight a drunken chick because her grown ass knew better but did it anyway. I'm working in my phone and I look up to see the leprechaun. I ask myself "Is he serious? Doesn't he notice that only females are up on the stools?" I then nudge 2 of the guys with me and ask them about the jersey. We come to a decision that we've NEVER seen the jersey that he had on (my friend and myself both attended MSU), but it might have been one of the jerseys from the Lady Spartans. With that, I introduce: Lucky Charms

I know it's hot but...

This doesn't need a whole lot of copy. I understand that we're getting the warmer temperatures and all, but please keep it tasteful. There was NOTHING hot about this picture, other than the weather.

Dude, where's my dignity?

Cinco De Mayo, ah yes! Some would call it (however offensive) Mexican's St. Patricks day. Lot's of tequila, Corona and Tecate (a Mexican beer I discovered that is much better than Corona, IMO). Generally, when there's public intoxication, there's public indecency. Two drunk female "friends" kissing has become so very cliche so I wasn't surprised to capture this on wax. After getting the pictures up on the computer, I was surprised to see two creepy guys looking like they were about to whip one off right in the middle of the crowd! With that, I bring to you: 40 (combined) year-old virgin

I only wanted to be in and out...

I'm driving to the apartment and rehearsing how the next few minutes will play out. "This will be a surgical extraction. Go in, round up the package with a bare minimum amount of conversation because you're tired and you have a 25 minute drive home" I tell myself. I got my game face on and I'm ready. Things NEVER seem to go as planned, although this was a welcomed delay. Upon pulling up in the apartment I see this:

I'm surveying the situation thinking "What in the hell did he do to get his shit tossed out?" All is quiet, so I go inside. Once inside, I look out the window to get a better pic of the scene, shown here:

I get what I came for and on my way out, I walk into what I just knew was the fight:

As it turns out, the two guys walking through the debris aren't involved in the situation. I did notice the lady to the far left of the picture looking disheveled and upset, so I assumed she shook the spot because she was about to get some "straightening" for throwing his shit out. Get this: the clothes on the ground are the lady's in the picture! Found that out because her bitch-made boyfriend is yelling at her out of the window calling her all kinds of sluts and whores. Now, listening in to everything, it's clear that she had sex with somebody other than him. I'm not mad at him for being mad, but throwing her shit out the window gets your man card revoked. I chuckle and then open the car door when I hear another lady yelling "Wait, wait!" I wait to see what's to come and the best moment of the night presents itself. Remember those two guys walking through the stuff on the lawn? The lady yelling was trying to get them to hold the door because she didn't have a key. They either ignored her didn't hear her and continued into the apartment. She hauled ass to get catch the door, but to no avail. She was running too fast for those baby doll shoes and was on some Charlie Brown just missed kicking the football shit! I had to focus in order to get the shot, but then laughed until my stomach hurt.

Swaggin' and Surfin'

So.....I'm driving home after a long day trying to figure some things out and I'm not in the best of moods. I'm road raging because this ass just cut me off and stopped me from making my left turn. Good thing I waited. I'm fussing and cussing as if my rant will make the van magically speed up. When the van turned, I punched the gas to complete my turn and avoid the traffic behind him because I waited long enough due to Mr. Rude. I start tailgating the van (I know...) for no good reason when something caught the corner of my eye. I look up and see a mattress and a shoe. "Hmmmm...What's wrong with this picture I ask myself?" The shoe should have fallen off during the turn and the mattress isn't tied down. How about it's weighted down with this crazy fuck ON TOP OF EVERYTHING! I don't know about you but in my highest and drunkest of days, I don't know if I would have tried to pull this off. I present: Dub T Surfing

Zebra can't change it's stripes...

So, I'm at the bowling alley working on a decent game and I hear all of this commotion. That's not unheard of in the bowling alley, so I try to ignore it and continue working on the rest of my game. Instead of dying down, the noise persisted and then increased. I had to see what the clamoring was about. I get about 6 pairs of lanes down and I spot him. Even though I was working on a good game, I had to run out to the truck, get the camera and capture this on wax. Without further ado, I present to you: Zebra Head...

Welcome!

It's been a long time in the making, but we're finally live. Welcome to the up & coming portal for all sorts of comical faux pas and debauchery. We aim to be your one-stop shop for all your humorous ignorance. We will highlight the lighter side and something positive on the "Urban Delight" tab, but make no mistake about it: Our focus is on reporting the thoughtless misdeeds that others choose to do.

Please be patient and don't hesitate to click on the "Talk To Us" tab and let us know your opinions, ideas or any problems you may discover.

Lastly, click the "Submit" tab and click it often! We're looking for the best (worst) that the world has to offer. We'll be having contests for content shortly.

Thanks again and laugh hard,
Poppa Rotsee